ADHD: Essential Ideas for Parents - Dr. Russell Barkely

If you’re still here looking at replies feel free to contact me. And or watch/listen to this video [VIDEO] Wish you'd left some way to contact you. Now that I'm at a computer I can say more but you're certainly not uncommon and there is lots of help that you can have. Cognitive behavior therapy shows great results in adult adhd/add patients. The video I linked talks about children but you'll likely feel yourself nodding along thinking of you. Money quote for me was something like the ADHD child has zero self motivation. All motivation comes from the outside world. Which is why kids can play video games for hours because there is instant feedback. But when you finish a problem on your homework nothing happens. And that there is a extremely poor short short term memory problem. Tons of stuff.

So I recently found this fascinating lecture on ADHD. It turns out, it’s poorly named and doesn’t really have to do with an attention deficit. Based on what you’ve said, I recommend watching the first 20 minutes, and continuing with it if it strikes you as relevant: [VIDEO]

If you're not trying to sound like a douche, don't put ADHD in scare quotes. Yes, it was over-diagnosed in the 90s, but I brought myself in and was diagnosed as an adult in 2009. Maybe watch this [VIDEO] if you don't think ADHD is real. No, I don't know for certain if this is related to my ADHD. I might just be inconsiderate and annoying. I'm speculating, because it's a behavior that I have spontaneously manifested, observed, criticized myself for, and yet still do. It fits in the category of "executive control" and "impulse control" and those are the things that ADHD impairs. And I already wear headphones most of the day when I'm in the office because music helps me focus and otherwise I start listening to the conversations around me. Listening to music while I work (and when I studied when I was in school) is one way I have managed my disorder throughout my life.

> Contrast that will ADD/ADHD. I'm not convinced it has anything to do with maturity or a lack thereof. Sure, mindfulness meditation helps quite a bit. But I think you can be mature, self sufficient, polite, etc, and yet still have ADHD, or immature, etc. and have ADHD. There is a very good video about 30 essential things parents should know about ADHD [VIDEO] One of them is that when unmedicated on average a person with ADHD has the maturity of someone 2/3 of its age. Its is just an average, but is relevant to think how different a 14 years old and a 21 years old are (or 20 and 30).

If you haven't already watched it: ADHD: Essential Ideas for Parents - Dr. Russell Barkely is essential to understanding ADHD at the neurological level. [VIDEO]

I'm not gonna disagree but I want to add a couple things. 1. Kids with ADHD probably can't develop executive function as fast or as far as other kids. I'm pretty sure I have it, it explains the repeated performance reports of "You're good when you apply yourself and useless when you don't." Unfortunately I struggle to _choose_ to apply myself. Willpower doesn't seem to come naturally to me, even after 10 years as a professional programmer. Adderall didn't help - I had to take it in the morning, after breakfast. So I was still late for work, because eating breakfast is not something I'm good at, and I couldn't start my day until I had finished breakfast. Then after work the stimulants wore off and I felt like shit and reverted to my normal do-what-i-want executive function. But it made me feel normal without caffeine. So I quit the Adderall and just cutting caffeinated soda with non-caff every morning, as though I was lowering my dose on a prescription. So far it's working. I still never clean my room, which is status quo for the last 20 years, and work is still pretty easy. The phrase "idiot savant" comes to mind. All I want is for people to stop thinking that I'm doing this on purpose. I don't enjoy constantly feeling like a moron and being behind on simple household chores despite making decent money at a job that is considered (by other people) to be difficult. And that might even be the case for the kids with detailed exercise programs. I don't exercise at all because it'

Hey, that sounds rough, very rough. It's not his fault. It's not your fault either. Speaking from experience myself, it's not that he purposely wants to speak its just that he can't not talk. Like people in a wheelchair would like to stand and walk but can't, or only very short distances. I can recommend to great resources. One is a YouTube series by Russel Barkley [1] The other are the books and podcast by Dr Hallowell [2] [1] [VIDEO] [2] [LINK]

It is possible, the condition is a bit poorly named. The video of the talk by Russell Barkley that is linked elsewhere is a good primer [VIDEO] ). People with ADHD can have episodes of hyper focus. However this is a bit a misnomer, it's called Perseveration and is not really a good thing, and has more to do with one's inability to task switch ( [LINK] ). However it also allows you to completely zone into a code base or a problem. The problem is you don't really have much control over what will catch your attention. But of course you can develop quite some deep technical expertise this way. Now, that said, there is a new movie, Everything Everywhere All At Once, and if you take this title as a stand in for ADHD, maybe you can see that while this way of living can be overwhelming it also allows you to have a pretty good overview over systems and how their components interacts very fast. I think that's what many ADHD'ers are actually very good at, grokking code bases or the gist of things very quickly. Systems thinking in general. Also quick recall / association chains... Also, on average, the higher your IQ, the later in your life your ADHD diagnosis will be (see this video on adult ADHD [LINK] ). Your other abilities can compensate somewhat for your ADHD. Also of course when battling this condition you will build many personal tools and habits that neuro-typical people will never have to do, so in that sense you also might have a leg up in certain situations. I'd say professio

The whole ADHD as an adaptation theory has been throughly debunked. Your confusion is very understandable because most people don't know what ADHD is. Some of the symptoms overlap with immaturity, so people who are not qualified to tell the difference will frequently misdiagnose the problem. If you want to understand ADHD, this video for parents of ADHD children will explain. [VIDEO] You don't need to watch the entire 3 hours. The first 10 minutes should be fairly enlightening.

ADHD is quite well studied. If you're up for it, there is a 2.5h video that goes into some detail about what it is and how it affects children. I found it quite fascinating and it helped me understand some of my symptoms. (Mine is comorbid with bipolar. Yay.) [VIDEO]

[VIDEO] [LINK] what ultimately works is asking for help, accepting that yes, it might not be what you want, but it gets you through this hurdle. maybe the next one will be easier. and get up to speed and then work on doing it alone, and then work on doing your best.

I strongly disagree and think you should consider watching the following: ADHD: Essential Ideas for Parents - Dr. Russell Barkley [VIDEO]

The newer ADHD meds are not stimulants and are not addictive. Maybe ADHD has "boomed" in """popularity""" because a disorder that used to be diagnosed as hyperactivity and a deficit of attention actually turned out to be a quantifiable problem with executive function which exists in a known part of the brain, can be quantifiably treated with medication and therapy, and if untreated results in very confusing problems with emotions and motivation for as long as you live. It's not as if ADHD doesn't exist. I'm speaking off of what was apparently state of the art 10 years ago. [VIDEO] I'm hoping today, in a matter of hours, to get prescribed one of these new non-stim drugs, because the stuff described in that video very much matches my experience. Maybe thinking that ADHD is made up has boomed in popularity because of the South Park and King of the Hill episodes that downplay it. Imagine learning medicine from cartoons.

I can't recommend this video enough. I wish this research and understanding was available when I was a kid. I figured out systems and tools to succeed in school and work (I was largely a C student testing in the top 0.1% of CA school kids on the standardized tests -- found that tidbit cleaning out my mom's things). It was the rejection I experienced in peer friendships that scarred me deeply, and as someone who has been unmedicated into my 40s, still impacts my adult friendships and professional relationships. ADHD: Essential Ideas for Parents - Dr. Russell Barkely [VIDEO] Some key tidbits to sell you (and your nephew's parents) on spending the full two hours with this: "... it also helps families to understand some of the other life course risks 50 to 70% of ADHD children are utterly rejected by close friendships by second grade it is in fact one of the more devastating consequences of this disorder is this inability to make and keep close sustained friendships with others their children and it is heartbreaking for parents to see this happening that their child is not as liked as other children that the sleepovers the going to the movies and the other social events in which other children celebrate their peer relationships are shut off for this child why is it there the single best predictor of peer rejection is that symptom the emotional impulsiveness friends forgive you your distractability your forgetfulness your working memory problems and even your restlessness they wil